Wandering in the desert

It’s mid July.  And it’s hot here in Wichita Falls.  Not hot enough to qualify as a desert, thank-you-very-much, but hot enough for this Kentucky native.

I’ve been absent from this, my “first love” in writing, for months.

But no more.  I’ve come to realize that I cannot be all things to all people, and I’ve re-aligned my commitments and priorities.  As much as I loved being a part of both A Widow’s Might and aNew Season ministries, those responsibilities were beginning to keep me from this, my first love.  I will never be able to express adequately both my love and my thanks to a group of women I worked alongside for 3 years.

Because of that opportunity, I am now a published contributing author, part of 4 seasonal widows’ devotionals (http://www.amazon.com/Love-HER-Life-Devotions-Ministries/dp/1499676255/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1436980258&sr=8-1&keywords=for+the+love+of+her+life).

Because of that opportunity, I have grown spiritually by leaps and bounds.  I have discovered a sisterhood of women, all part of the club no one wants to join.

But God is calling me to follow in a new direction.  One that I am so not equipped for.     He assures me He will do the necessary equipping, as needed.

I’ve argued with Him, asking:

“Are You sure, God?”

Questioned His nudging:

“Do You really think I can do this?”

Attempted to barter with Him (yes, I know, not a good idea!):

“Just let me keep doing what I’m doing, at least until xxx date.  Then, I’ll be ready to take the plunge.”

He’s having none of it.  So I finally surrendered.  Cried “uncle.” Threw in the towel.

I’m listening.  No more excuses, no more one-sided arguments.

God’s a great negotiator.  He ALWAYS wins.

Another chapter in the re-invention of Nancy has begun.

I don’t know how my story will end. Heavens, I don’t even know what tomorrow will bring.

But surprisingly, I’m not worried.

The best Author ever is in charge of writing it.

The one thing I do know for sure is that it certainly won’t be boring.

All for His glory, that’s my motto.

 This is what the scripture says:

“If you hear God’s voice today,
    do not be stubborn, as your ancestors were
    when they rebelled against God.”

Who were the people who heard God’s voice and rebelled against him?

All those who were led out of Egypt by Moses.

With whom was God angry for forty years?

With the people who sinned, who fell down dead in the desert. 

When God made his solemn promise, “They will never enter the land where I would have given them rest”—of whom was he speaking? Of those who rebelled. We see, then, that they were not able to enter the land, because they did not believe.  

Hebrews 3:15-19 (GNT)

Equip me, God.  Enough to get through today.  No more wandering in the desert, I promise.  Nine months is my limit.  My thirst is parched, my soul hungry for You.  I know You are enough.

Tomorrow, we’ll do it again.  And again the next day….until I’m who You want me to be.

love, Nancy

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